Trying to work out why this is different

Sorry for the double post today. This post has been sitting in my drafts for a couple of weeks. I decided I should either finish it or delete it. If you are reading it I guess that gives away what I decided to go with!

When I first started my attempt at 'getting there this time' I didn't know exactly how that was going to happen. I just knew that I felt awful. I got blinding headaches every couple of weeks when my sugar levels dropped. I woke most mornings feeling sick and sluggish. My clothes were as tight as they could get before needing the next size up, or if I am honest I probably would have been more comfortable in clothes 2 sizes up. I could feel my body wobbling when I brushed my teeth. That one was a big kick, it surely isn't right for your belly to wobble when you brush your teeth! Basically I was a mess.

I have tried various 'diets' in the past. The first one being when I was 20 and weighed 10st 10lbs (150lbs). That seems like nothing now. I spent a few weeks eating 1000 kcal/20g fat maximum and doing a few sit ups/leg raises. I now know that was probably one of the most un-healthy attempts I have made to lose weight. I know a lot more about nutrition now and what good food really is. I got down to 10st 2lbs (142lbs). It lasted about 3 weeks before I started to gain it all back. Up to 12st 2lbs (170lbs) by the time I got married at 24. Up to 14st 7lbs (203lbs) by the time I was 26 and Bookworm was 6 months old. After that I managed to get it back down to 12st 2lbs again before I got pregnant with Hyperboy. After he was born it went down and up and down and up between 13st 8 1/2lbs (190.5lbs) and 11st 10lbs (164lbs) repeatedly. Mostly at the upper end of that range. I've tried Weight watchers, south beach, atkins and slimming world based.

At no point in any of this did I try just plain and simple eating less of the things I enjoy eating and doing more exercise. This time it's different. The eating this time round is proper food of the sort that works for our family life. I am just eating smaller portions of it and thinking more about balancing it. If I know tea is going to be heavier I will compensate and have salad for lunch.

The other biggest difference is that I am snacking a lot less. After a couple of weeks of blogging I noticed buttons for http://www.myfitnesspal.com/. I started using it and have to say it has been great for me. I have found it so easy to track what I am eating on there and it takes out so much of the guesswork about how much I should eat. I don't go too strict on myself. If I have eaten my quota and I am hungry then I eat. If I haven't eaten my quota but am stuffed I listen to my body.

The other thing I have never tried is good old fashioned exercise. I have a bicycle which a couple of times I have half heartedly ridden. I have legs which used to enjoy cross country at school but have done nothing more than walk since. I love swimming but have been too damn lazy to go. I am doing all of those things now. But none of those are what have got me into the routine. That is down to Jillian Michaels 30 day shred DVD. I bought a copy a few months ago having seen several mentions of it. I did 5 days over a couple of weeks, got ill and then it gathered dust. After starting this blog it was popping up everywhere. Blogs I was reading, facebook status of a friend, message boards. I decided to get it out and do the 30 days. The progress I made doing that was enough to convince me that I could work out.

A new swimming pool opened 1.5 miles from home and Hyperboy learnt to cycle which gave me a reason to go out for bike rides. Bookworm started lessons at the new pool and finishes at just the right time for my husband to meet us there and whisk the children home while I stay and swim.

Lots of the blogs I read are by people who have taken up running as part of their journey. I was reminded that I used to enjoy it and decided to start too. I am now using the c25k programme. With the help of my fitness pal I can see how much difference the exercise makes to the amount of food I eat and am really enjoying it.

9 weeks ago I was hating myself, couldn't run for 1 minute and the idea of feeling good about myself was alien. Now I feel so much better. I am a third of the way to a healthy BMI and can see myself getting there. It won't be as quick as it might be if I were to follow a low calorie diet or some other eating plan. But this is working for me and it's working well. The smile on my face is growing as the rest of me is shrinking.