About Me

I am a 33 year old mum of two who has spent her entire teenage and adult life struggling with her weight. I am not going to struggle with it anymore. I am in charge!

Thursday, 19 May 2011

Letting the cat out of the bag and a bit of gushing.

I have bored anyone reading this blog repeatedly with the fact that, in the past, when other people have started to comment on me losing weight I end up going way off track. The other day after my super swim I couldn't keep it to myself and my facebook status reflected that. One of my closest friends emailed me to ask what I had been doing so I replied. I even told her I had been keeping a blog (but didn't give her the link). This is my place to let off steam and get my thoughts (good and bad) out without worrying about what my friends think. If anyone knows me and figures out this blog is mine I don't want to know! Anyway yesterday my friend called me and told me she was really impressed. She knows how many times I have gone up and down with weight. We had a long chat and then realised that we'd not actually seen each other since I started this. I will be seeing her in a couple of weeks for the first time in nearly two months.

The biggest part of the conversation for me was accepting the praise she gave me. I didn't feel uncomfortable about it and enjoyed it for what it was. I then realised that this weekend I will be seeing a whole bunch of people who haven't seen me since before I began this.

This got me thinking. I know that the people I will be seeing WILL say something. One of them in particular always notices (as every good mother should notice changes in their children). My Mum will say something. It will be complimentary. I know that it is going to happen and keeping this blog has made me realise that I have gone way off track in the past when that happens. I think maybe the reason I opened up on facebook was to help prepare myself for the inevitable. Since speaking with my friend I am still on track. I think I gave myself some practice ready for the weekend.

My blanket squares that came about as a result of my musings on the subject of me feeling safer with the status quo haven't really been happening. I am surrounded by new babies recently so lots of knitting time has been going on them. I know it is there though and I want that blanket to be big enough to keep me nice and warm come winter. I will be picking it up again just as soon as I am finished with my current new baby knit. I am also going to post up a photo soon of the squares I have completed so far.

My blanket is getting bigger, my body is getting smaller and my confidence in myself is growing every day. I know that there will still be days where I stumble but I also know that I can come back here and read back through past posts but more importantly get inspiration from other bloggers. There are some truly amazing people who have been blogging their way through a similar journey. Their words have done so much to help me get on the path and stay on it. Particularly the following ones. You probably know them already but their words inspire me greatly so if you don't go and check them out.

http://alltheweigh2009.blogspot.com/ - Kenz has more determination in her little finger than some people have in their whole body.
http://diaryoffatwoman.blogspot.com/ - Joanna's was the first blog I read when I was starting. She juggles study, family and getting herself healthy. An inspirational woman.
http://alittlelessoflauren.blogspot.com/ - Lauren is someone I am honestly jealous of. I really wish that I had 'got it' at that age. As well as doing an amazing job of losing weight she is very honest in her blog. She also has one of the most beautiful smiles I have ever seen.
http://www.thefitbee.com/ - Colleen's story is one of those that made me say 'wow'. She has achieved a massive amount and has completely changed her life. I defy anyone to read it and not be inspired.
http://chrislivessimple.blogspot.com/ - Christine has given me words of wisdom that have meant a massive amount. She is very honest and open in her blog and I love the fact that she really puts herself out there.

There are others that I read, enjoy and am inspired by but these women have really helped me. Enough gushing. I'm off to enjoy the day.

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